urban legends

MACABRE MIDWEST

Breadbasket or head basket, whichever applies here.  The heartland of the U.S. in the heart of the midwest are the region of fright tonight.  Charlie barker makes three stops in the area.

First, it’s a tale straight out of Illinois with the true story of RESURRECTION MARY.  She’s the highway ghost with the most..sightings.  Second, We head to St. Louis, Missouri, to visit a haunted estate in THE MISERY OF LEMP MANSION.  It’s got a doosie of a curse on it, folks.  Finally, we head to Iowa with the legend of THE BLACK ANGEL OF OAKLAND CEMETERY.  It’s another haunted cursed cemetery sure to please.

Charlie may be a bit weary of travels, but he is never too fatigued to open up the flaps of the sideshow.  Come back next time for another show from the Circus of the Unknown.

FIRE AND ICE

Are you one of those people that is always too hot or too cold?  Charlie Barker is that way, but you know it may be because he is nothing but bones.  Today, Charlie takes the circus to extreme temperatures on the opposite ends of the spectrum.

First, we take a trip up north as part of our “States of Fear” sub-series.  Alaska, this time.  Conspiracy theorists unite as we start PLAYING THE HAARP.  Then, continuing waaaaay south on our road trip, we head to Hawaii where we are warned DON’T TAKE PORK ACROSS THE PALI.  Then, we visit the origin of a popular urban legend.  The absolutely true story that we will get to the bottom of COME HELL OR HIGH WATER.  It’s a frigid fare guaranteed to astonish or at least baffle.

And now, it’s time for Charlie to take shelter from the temperature extremes.  Something neutral for a while.  You know, just like the inside of a tauntaun.  Luke warm.  Until next time…

CREEPYPASTA WITH EXTRA CHEESE

This week, Charlie Barker takes the debatable position that CreepyPasta is a relatively new literary form.  Charlie examines three tales in the style of CreepyPasta legends that were plucked right out of the realm of the unknown.  They are, of course, absolutely true – at least in one of the infinite alternate realities.

How do you address a haunted colonial stockade that cannot be destroyed?  Why, you ship it off to the west coast and wish them all the best in BITTER PILLORY TO SWALLOW.  Next, it is a terrifying figure of a different sort.  One hand drawn on concrete.  Too bad the CHALKMAN didn’t stay on the sidewalk where he belonged.  Then, it is the legend of a woman who tragically lost her life (and a little more above the neck) in THE FLOATING HEAD OF LUCY TASH.

Thanks again for your support of the surreal and supernatural.  Your face is always welcome in this establishment.  Your face and any other body parts you wish to contribute.

MIND GAMES

Welcome, welcome!  So glad you’ve returned.  Old Char is up to his tricks again, folks.  He really likes to mess with your mind.

Three tales of the mind and madness are featured in the sideshow of the surreal today.  First, how do you really know who you are if everyone else is convinced that you are someone else?  This is the question to ponder in THE FACE IS FAMILIAR.  Of course, the trip could be downhill all the way as you take a DESCENT INTO MADNESS. Sadly, it’s a one way trip.  Finally, maybe it really is your mind they are after – or at least your brains in THE PHANTOM WRECKER.  If you see it on a lonely stretch of mountainous highway, just keep driving.  Don’t check your rearview mirror.  And above all, keep your head on!

If you’ve managed to keep your wits about you, and your brains planted firmly in your skull, then we would love to see you next time.  Please return to the Circus of the Unknown. We’ll try to make Charlie behave next time.