HOLIDAZED

YEAR’S END

This is the end.  My only friend, the end.  The circus packs up and hits the road today.  Time for one final trio of totally true tales of terror.

What happens after Christmas and before New Year’s Eve?  Why, Boxing Day, of course!  What happens when the dead rise?  Why, UNBOXING DAY, of course!  Then, it’s time to set up for the end of the year party with that sparkly MIRROR BALL.  After that, there is nothing left but THE COUNTDOWN until that ball drops.

Thank you, my friends, for your patronage to the Sideshow of the Surreal.  Charlie Barker tips his hat to you, one final time.  Goodbye.

YULE BE SORRY

Ho ho hold on there.  You don’t think ole Charlie Barker would let you get by without a little Christmas cheer, did you?  It’s very festive at the sideshow today.  It’s time for a trio of holiday treats.

What could be a better present that getting THE FAMILY PORTRAIT.  Too bad the canvas shows something terrible instead.  It’s also time to set up that CHRISTMAS VILLAGE.  All those miniatures sure look real, don’t they?  Then, nothing says the holidays like an old hag with a broomstick.  WE WITCH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS has just the thing for your seasonal delight.

There’s just one left, ladies and gents.  Come back for the end of the year closeout special at the Sideshow of the Surreal.  Until then, Merry Christmas!

IN THE GOOD OLE SUMMERTIME

The days are long and the nights are short.  What a perfect time of the year to attend the circus.  Even the sideshow provides a brief reprieve from the blaring sun.

The summer also offers tales fit for the sunny season.  Three of them are on display for you now.  First, a hazard that occurs naturally due to the heat and lack of adequate precipitation to produce a SUMMER WILDFIRE. Don’t get burnt! Next, it also sounds like a naturally occurring phenomenon, but actually it’s the name of a roller coaster called THE HURRICANE.  Those things are scary for a reason.  Finally, it’s a little summertime kids game to be played at night.  It’s FLASHLIGHT TAG and you’re it!

It’s going to get hotter before it cools down any, friends.  Just take solace in the fact that the circus won’t be pulling up stakes anytime soon.  Seen you in the sideshow again, soon.

FATHERLY FRIGHTS

If Bob is your uncle, who’s your old man?  Charlie Barker wants to know.  In fact, it is the main display at the sideshow today.

Fathers are the focus of the frightening fables.  First, do you enjoy playing games with your father?  How about FOR your father?  It’s a terrifying tale known as SCAVENGER HUNT.  Another dad and his sons discover the beast in the darkness in LAIR OF THE CAVE DEMON.  Lastly, there are BIGGER FISH TO FRY when a son is the only person who knows about a monster in his apartment furnace room.

Until next time, the sideshow is closed.  If you want a treat before then, go ask your father for it.